It's swings and Roundabouts.....................

THIS IS A TRUE STORY

Those of you who know me personally are aware of the fact that I absolutely detest driving.

Even so, I'm not a nervous driver - I just don't like all that "looking and thinking" that's required.

It's so much easier to be a passenger. You have the luxury of peering into people's houses and other sociology related pastimes!

No matter how much I try to explain to Mumsie - she is still under the illusion that I'm scared.

A few years ago, I had a job interview in Sheffield, about 50 odd miles from where I live............

MUMSIE: Oh, you poor thing! Will you have to drive on the motorway?

ME: Yes, I will. Don't worry Mum, I'll be fine. I have been driving over 20 years.

MUMSIE: Even so........... I'd better come with you. We could do some clothes shopping at Meadowhall Shopping Centre.

(I don't know why she used this argument - I hate shopping almost as much as I hate driving!)

Nevertheless, I knew she would only worry herself sick if I didn't take her along to "navigate."

So, we arrived in Sheffied in plenty of time. Mumsie went for a coffee - I went for the interview.

After dragging me round several shops, she finally agreed to head back when I mentioned that it was getting near school leaving time. I hinted that there could be a traffic jam in the City Centre.

On the drive back along the M1 Motorway, Mumsie was so enthusing about her new purchases, I missed my turn off.

I didn't panic as I have a good knowledge of the geography around the East Midlands.

For some reason, Lincoln is never signposted 'til reaching the outskirts of the City. Newark is the nearest town and is always marked on roadsigns.

Even if it was to take longer to reach home, I knew we weren't truly lost.

It was quite some time before we saw a Newark turn off. By now we were in Derbyshire!

Still following the directions for Newark we ended up driving through the delightful village of.........

wait for it.............................

CLOWNE!

(You couldn't make up stuff like this!)

I spotted a roadsign for a mini-roundabout.

(For any non-drivers or non-Brits, this is negotiated like a larger road roundabout - giving way to the left to any traffic.)

All of the mini roundabouts I'm used to are the flat variety.

If no other cars are about, drivers do tend to drive over them, myself included.

Not quite as bad as this though!

Unfortunately, the one in Clowne is raised like this.......................

Poor old Mumsie!

I'd really shaken her up.

Forty minutes later we arrived back in Lincoln.

Not only did I get stuck with an unexpected bill from my Mum.................

I didn't even get the job I'd interviewed for!