The Rain in Spain Stays Mainly on the Plain.......

Another story here about my lovely Mumsie. She's such a character, and she has a wicked sense of humour.

Sometimes she says things, not even realising they are funny.

Sometimes, just sometimes, she will say something so outrageous you just wish the ground would open up and swallow you!

Today's post relates to the way we speak, particularly accents.

There are quite a few variations across Lincolnshire. The accent for Lincoln City itself is very much like the Nottingham one.

Su Pollard (AKA Peggy Ollerenshaw) is from Nottingham.

I sound very much like that, but not quite so fast!

Both of my Grandfathers came from Yorkshire, Mum's dad from Bradford, Dad's dad from Leeds.

Dad's accent's definitely Lincoln, but Mum has a touch of Yorkshire even though she never lived there.

This is most noticeable by the things she says rather than what she says.

I went to the type of school that punished dropping H's in our speech, by giving out detention, during which we would have to write out 100 times

"I must not drop my aitches"

"I must not drop my aitches"

Although I was well behaved, and never in trouble for anything else, I dropped so many aitches that I had to borrow the Caretaker's broom to sweep them all up!

"Sorry, Miss. I've forgotten my 'omework."

So, there I would be, week after week, doing my lines.

Please Sir, can I 'ave some more?

I was a ghastly teenager, and decided that if I wasn't allowed to pronounce words incorrectly, no-one else in the family could.

I don't know where my bravery came from, but I started picking on my Mum in particular.

(Crikey, I was a plucky lass back then, I wouldn't dare do that now!)

Mumsie was having none of it, and did it all the more to annoy me.

I'd made a new friend, Julia who spoke very posh.

All of her family were posh - they even had a fridge!

(Well, it was posh in 1967!)

I was a Day Pupil but Julia was a Boarder as her Dad was a Bishop down south somewhere.

There had been a minor fire and two of the dormitories were water damaged.

So some of the boarders were billeted out to stay with us lesser mortals for a week.

Mumsie loves visitors, always has, so she said that Julia could stay at our house.

The day before Julia was coming to stay, Mumsie and I were making sandwiches.

I was buttering, Mumsie was filling and cutting them up.

She asked me to pass her a bread knife from the drawer.

"I think it might be a bit blunt. Dad used it when he couldn't find his hacksaw to shorten the budgie's perch" I said handing it to her

She tried to cut through the bread, "Bloody 'ell, you're not wrong, lass. You could ride bare-arsed to London on this one."

A terrible thought struck me, what if she says something like that when Julia's here?

"Muuuuuum..........?" I said

Mum answered, "I know what you're gonna say, the answer is - No I won't say that when Julia's here."

Phew!? Thank goodness for that.

The next day, Julia and I arrived at our house.

"Put your bags down girls and we'll have a nice cuppa tea and a piece of Hangel cake."

She meant Angel cake.

As she began to cut the cake, she looked at me, winked naughtily and said

"Oh dear! One curd ride bare-bottomed to Lurndon on this!"

P.S. I love the pic at the top of my post. It's Mumsie and Daddio with my granddaughter Evie. It was taken at my ex-husband's wedding last summer. What a lovely thing that he invited them. We always find room in our family for one more :O)