Oh dear! I had a bit of a calamity this morning.
As I mentioned before, occasionally when I visit my local Sainsbury's, I invariably join in the Rugby Scrum along with the other Old Biddies who are also looking for the marked down items in the Deli aisle.
I was feeling a bit worn out this morning because I decided to.............
clean the windows
do the ironing
change the bed covers
and have a general tidy up.
Please note, this only what I decided to do.
I didn't actually do any of the jobs.
Sometimes just the thought of what I should be doing is enough to tire me out.
So, anyway........................... er, what was I saying?
Oh yes, Asda's......
Not feeling up to participating in the geriatric ballet in Sainsbury's
I thought I'd go to Asda's instead
When I get out of my car to go shopping, I lift my specs and pop them on the top of my head.
If I leave them on, any writing on food labels looks like this..................
However, if I take them off and put them in my bag,
I can't find my way round the aisles.
I still shudder about the time I was telling a fellow shopper how good a particular tin of meat was, not realising I was in the Dog Food aisle!
(I didn't tell her that I'd made the same mistake the previous week and had actually bought a tin!
Aahh, but did I EAT it? Not telling!)
So, there I go as I'm walking round -
"Where's the aisle I want?" - specs down on my nose
"How many calories is this?"- specs up on my head
and so on.
I was bending down picking up some fizzy water, specs on top of my head.
When I stood up again
I hit my head on the trolley handle, and broke my glasses.
Thankfully I'd almost finished my shopping.
Even so, I'm still not quite able to carry on as normal.
So I've written this little song
It's sung to the tune of "Yesterday"
With apologies to Lennon and Mc Cartney
I’m sad today
All my bloggers seem so far away,
I broke my specs in Asda’s this fine day
They’re cracked and ruined
They’re broke for good,
I can’t see as well as I once could
I’m even lost in my own neighbourhood
You’d cry for me,
You really would
Why I broke them there
I don’t know,
I couldn’t say
I felt lost inside
As I left the trolley bay, ay, ay,ay
I phoned the Specs chap just to hear him say
They’re past their best
And I will have to pay
I’m stoney broke
I’ve no cash at all
'Cos I’ve spent it all away
I’ve bought so much stuff
So I’ll blame it on eBay, ay, ay, ay
Anyway, I 'phoned up one of my pals, and she said I can borrow a pair of hers
I must dash - I've just realised that I parked at my neighbours house instead of my own, and she's just arrived home from work.
She's gonna be REEAAALLY mad
Not only am I using her computer
I've eaten all of her custard creams!