I can't keep it quiet any longer - I have decided that the time has come for me to come out of the closet.
(Or in my case, "come out of the pantry")
Some of my family read this blog. They are going to be so shocked. I suspect some of them may dis-own me. Once this news leaks out, I will be a marked woman.
People will point and stare at me, I will hear them whispering behind my back. The spotty youth who works on the '10 items or less till' at Tesco's will no longer let me through with 11 purchases.
Oh woe is me! Woe is me!
Why have I decided to 'fess up?
Well, folks are getting curious. The neighbours are wondering what's going on.
They have noticed this..................
and they can't fail to notice this making daily deliveries...................
I'm also beginning to show the evidence of my sins...........
The pounds are piling on, so I can't pretend it's not happening.
You see, the thing is................
Well, what I'm trying to say is..............
Oh! Dammit, this is so difficult............
What I want to tell everyone is...........
No, no, no - I'm not pregnant!
It's just that I have a secret addiction and it's getting out of control.
I am a slave to my cravings.
I've tried to stop, honest I have. But you see, I'm totally addicted to
I hope that all my dear sweet bloggeroos will bear with me whilst I am trying to give up.
I've tried Cold Turkey, but yer know - it just doesn't taste the same.
(Not even if I cover it in salad cream!)
I've found an online support group.
It's called "Get The Monkey Off Your Back"
Anyway I've joined, and they've already sent me a Coco Pops Cessation Pack.
This comprises of a helpful hints and tips leaflet, here's an excerpt..........
Lock away your usual cereal bowls and all dessert spoons.
If you really must have some Coco Pops, use only a sundae dish and the smallest teaspoon you can find.
Wear the enclosed t-shirt - this will help you to remain focussed
If all else fails use the STOP patches that is included in your pack
I decided to try the patches. I assumed they were probably impregnated with Coco Pop extract, to help with the cravings.
I had it stuck on my arm for 3 days.
It was no help whatsoever!
I went on their Help Forum Message Board this afternoon.
Apparently, I'd completely got hold of the wrong end of the stick.
You're supposed to use the patches like this....................
Come on then you lot!
Tell me YOUR secret addictions - I DARE YOU!