Life's Little Luxuries!

Okay, Ladies! Hands up those of you who can remember the days before email.

Oh good, I'm not the only one on here with silver hair. (Well, it is silver underneath the old L'Oreal anyway.)

For the benefit of my younger bloggeroos, before the joys of instant electronic mail - we used a fax machine. (see pic.)

Before I retired from the "Real World" I worked in publishing. (Newspapers, Magazines, Promotional Literature.)

In the late 1990's I worked in the Special Publications Department at the Lincolnshire Echo. As well as the monthly publications being distributed in the Echo, we also printed 10,000 copies on heavier gauge paper that were mailed out throughout the whole of Britain. These were posted out from a Mailing House company in Yorkshire.

We had one fax for the whole floor, approx. 100 of us. Sometimes the queue to use the fax machine was so long, there was talk of employing a busker to entertain us while we waited!

Each month we had to fax over a delivery report to the Mailing House. This would be about 20 pages long, and would take ages to go through.

One day, the fax at the Mailing House wasn't working properly. Sid 'phoned me to ask me to send it to him again.

I looked over my shoulder - there were six colleagues queueing at the fax.

I told him there was a bit of a queue for the fax and that I'd try again after lunch.

In the afternoon, before I'd had a chance to send the report again, the 'phone rang..........

ME: Special Publications, Sue speaking.

SID: (with no pre-amble whatsoever) We've got no paper. I haven't even got a spare roll in the cupboard.

ME: Oh, dear, Sid. That's a terrible state of affairs! Have you had a visit from the Andrex puppy?

Sid then realised the comedy in what he'd said, and we both had a giggle.

He continued with a mock posh professional voice.......

SID: In view of the paper situation, I wonder, Miss, if you would kindly send the report by Royal Mail, First Class?

I answered him in my mock posh professional voice

ME: Why of course Mr Nugent. Always happy to help. Consider it done!

SID: You're so kind.

We both hung up and I put the 20 page report in an A4 envelope.

Before I stuck it down, I went into the Ladies' Room and enclosed..............................

Two sheets of toilet paper

I also enclosed a compliments slip and wrote:

Hope this helps!

The next day I received the following from their company............

FAX COVER SHEET

URGENT!!!!!!

FOR THE ATTENTION OF

SUE SMITH, FARMING ECHO

FROM: SID NUGENT, YORKSHIRE MAILSHOTS LTD.

Thank you for the speedy despatch of 20 page report for Farming Echo mailshot.

Although it was very kind of you to sympathise with our current paper shortage, I feel it only fair to give feedback from my employees………….

“The quality of the paper was inferior and the quantity insufficient”

Still, I suppose it’s the thought that counts!

Hugs and kisses

Sid

XXXX

This is a true story!